Juliet, Naked by Nick Hornby

Tucker Crowe is the ying to my yang, umm, not. Remember when you used say things like “not”? Well, I guess that depends on how old you are. But, I kind of do.  Nice tangent, but anyways, my image of Tucker Crowe, who is one of two/three main characters in this story, is probably more like that incredibly obnoxious, ridiculously untalented (although Tucker’s character may have a little) brit, Russell Brand. Hopefully that paints some sort of picture. But I somehow doubt that is how Nick Hornby wants you to see one of his characters

You may choose to never read my blog again after reading this and if that’s the case so be it (I feel like I’ve been saying that too often recently). I have not read any of Hornby’s other books although I think I should have read High Fidelity, Slam and About a Boy before reading this so that I would have a better understanding of Mr. Hornby’s style.

I could be wrong but it certainly seems as though I would classify this book and many of his others as “Lady Books.” Why? Well, it seems as though his books seem to revolve around music, romance and relationships. I may not have read his other books but I have seen some of the movies which validates my thinking. And this book is certainly all about those three things. And any book, in my eyes, that has a heavy dose of romance and relationships gets put in that genre.

Now, this book was entertaining but not knock me off my feet, laugh out loud, page turning entertaining. It was a quick read but I don’t necessarily equate that to a page turner. Basically it’s a story of three characters a former rock star (Tucker Crowe aka Russell Brand), Duncan, one of his obsessive fans and Annie, who is in a relationship with Duncan.

The story takes on the element of a love triangle in that Duncan loves Annie and Tucker (in a musical sense). I won’t give you more on that for fear of spoiling something. The novel goes on to inspect the hardships involving rock stardom including infidelity, illegitimate children, lying and running away (where’s the sympathy?). I mean, the novel was pretty well thought out and humorous at times but honestly I had a really hard time truly enjoying it.

In the end the story was all prepped for a big climax and it pretty much let me down. You know, I’m ok with that though, it kind of went along with how I felt about the rest of the story. Had there been some climax it probably wouldn’t have fit the story in the way it should.

This one won’t keep from reading his other books but it may very well put a spin on them that may not have been there had I read them first.

Little Bee by Chris Cleave

For some reason, which I haven’t quite figured out yet, my mother wanted me to read this book. When my mom recommends a book to me I usually skip all pretenses and read it, besides the rest of my family, who knows me best? I think her exact sentence was “I want to know what you think?” Well mom, here is what I think.

First off, I’ve categorized this as a “lady book” because the story centers around two women who are struggling to get passed the past and live life now. I don’t know if I would or could call them strong women but they are both righteous in their own ways. The men in this story, minus “batman,” are not so righteous and provide the reader with an overpowering sense of weakness of character in each of them, which does of course empower the women all the more.

This is actually a very difficult book to review in that I don’t want to give anything away and by saying to much there will be nothing for you, yourself, to discover or learn when you pick it up. I will say this, it was an enjoyable read and without having any idea as to what will happen or being able to foresee what is going to happen the reader is pretty much engaged from the beginning.

What I can tell you is that it is a story of a Nigerian refugee. What you will learn from this book is depressing and it is not a happy tale. It will most likely open your eyes to some things that you may or may not have already known, and things that some government institutions would probably rather keep quiet. Read this book and learn something, learn how perhaps many of the things we take for granted are not available to people where corporations, governments, soldiers and mercenaries rule the land.

I wouldn’t be too surprised to find out somewhere down the line that is an “Oprah” book or a book that wins some awards. It’s well written and well thought out. It’s clear that Mr. Cleave devoted much time and research into getting things right and the final outcome leaves little to question about what happens or happened in the environments that he writes about. Like I said, I’d love to write more about this book and give you more details as to my thoughts but I can’t really do so without giving the whole story away. It’s not exactly an uplifting book but nevertheless I would recommend it.

Waiting by Ha Jin

I’ve never had much trouble with love stories, so long as they offer me something new. Granted I rarely choose to read one, although from time to time it’s acceptable for a man of my nature (you know, dashing, refined, intelligent and pompous). If it’ll make a lady happy I will gladly sit through a romantic movie; however, I don’t think I can say the same about reading a book about a love, lost or found. I can say with certainty that if I read another book as bland and lovey dovey as this one I may choose to cut out one of my eyes (that way I can wear an eye patch and still be pretty cool).

The only thing this book had going for it was the small tidbits of information and  views of communist China over a twenty or so year period. Just last year, before I started recording my thoughts on books and was studying Mandarin Chinese, I went through a heavy China phase where every other book I picked up was about the Far East. None  centered on the period of time of this book (1960′s – 1980′s) so it helped to put a few pieces together. The writing revealed the subtle changes of the communist regime during that time period but I would have enjoyed more history and less of the pansy love.

I read somewhere that Ha Jin served in the People’s Liberation Army which adds a great deal of credence to the things he writes about. His style was interesting and fresh with metaphors. Unfortunately the story fell flat. Give this book to a woman and she may cry (I am not a chauvinist, I swear). Give it to a man and he very well may laugh in your face. Jin’s storyline is generic, unconvincing and is no different from  other love stories out there.

Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

Yep, it’s true, I read it. Come on, how could I resist? After all, for the past several months I’ve seen a kajillion women reading this on the bus. I realize that no male valet would be caught dead reading it but I decided to give it a shot in hopes of it giving me some insight into the female psyche and possibly a date or two. Let’s just say I was too cowardly to actually let anyone know I was reading this book, needless to say there were no dates, woe is me.

First things first, why in the world would you point out every possible thing that you are not going to talk about in your book in the first 15 pages? And then… proceed to talk about said things for the next 200+ pages, I just don’t get it.

I typically love a good travel story. This is not one of those typical travel books. Of course I realize that it was never meant to be that but in a way it came across as a blend of a woman finding herself and an adventure. Unfortunately there was no adventure, there was this:

Italy – I’m glad you ate and put on some weight. Now, stop your whining.

India – I’m glad you were finally able to find some way to meditate. Now, stop your complaining.

Indonesia (Bali) – Finally you stopped your bellyaching and found love, balance and peace. Thankfully the story can end now.

Its easy to see why so many women flock to this book. Liz Gilbert is a troubled woman going through tough times who decides that she needs her independence and freedom to find herself (and Oprah loved it). The only thing is, she goes to the absolute extremes to do so. I’ve never been a fan of self help or help books in general but I don’t really understand what a woman can glean from reading this. I did come to understand though that women masturbate just like men do (already knew it, but thought I’d throw it in for good measure and to pretend like I learned something from reading this).

Alas, I have a confession to make; every time I picked up this book I was inhibited. I was either extremely tired, nauseous on the bus (to the point of vomiting) or inebriated. Yes, I felt the only way that I could continue reading this book at times was to drink and not in moderation. These things happen, what more can I say?

My recommendation is such, men please don’t bother. Women, sure go ahead and read it but please don’t get any crazy ideas.

Update: Extremely disturbing and frighteningly I’ve just discovered that they plan on turning this book into a movie starring Julia Roberts and Javier Bardem. What is this world coming to?